There is a garden in her eyes, where roses and white lilies flow.
— Thomas Campion
Sometimes I wonder what my heart felt before I had children. I don’t remember. What I have in my heart for my girls is infinitely larger than whatever it was before they came to be.
Big Love turns six tomorrow. And while I usually have mixed emotions about her growing older, this year the mourning became a little less…and the celebration a little more. She’s amazing. When I was planning her 6 year session, I had visions of hazy summer light and whispering winds. I envisioned her sitting under a big oak tree on a hill in her dreamy little world because that’s where she often resides. But when it rained the motherload of all rains the evening of her session I simply couldn’t wait another day to do it and so we trekked out to the farm the next morning, the same farm where I took her 5 year pictures last year. And I’m glad (for once) that I let my impatience get the best of me. Not only was it overcast and cooler, but my sweet Big Love created her own hazy summer sunshine and whispering winds. I watched her talk herself into her little world and she let me look in. We talked about hopes and dreams and what she wants to be when she grows up. We talked about the rain and the fog and the different types of grass. She picked grass and made it into different shapes. And it was ever so quiet out there, ever so peaceful. No traffic. No computers or cell phones (gasp! I didn’t even take mine with me). No tv or music. Just us. And it was perfect. And what I got were images of my beautiful 6-year-old growing up little girl. I’m so glad she brought Lovey along too. It’s almost the only thing left that keeps my Big Love…well, little.