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Disappointment

“I’m sorry to say
so but, sadly it’s true
that bang-ups and hang-ups
can happen to you.”

Dr. Seuss

We had such a great time hangin’ out with our community yesterday at our local festival!  Neither Big Love nor Baby Love had a nap.  They were dirty, grubby, sticky little creatures after running amok, playing in the dirt, riding rides, and eating snow cones.  Both of them remained happy, however, until Baby Love lost her snow cone ice.  The snow cone maker had actually just made them a snowball.  Finally, Big Love’s snowball melted until she could no longer hold it.  She said, “Oh noooo!”  Looked at it a few seconds, and then went over to the curb and did this, where I happily took her picture and tried not to fall over laughing.

I have to admit though, I actually stomp my feet when I’m disappointed….well, only sometimes. 😉

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For Future Reference:

There is so much that I’ve learned from having two children as opposed to one. So much that I need to remember in case we ever have another one. So much I just feel the need to share with those that only have one but may have another.

1.  If it’s been found in or under the furniture or on the floor and it’s not moldy, it’s probably still edible.

2.  Whatever non food product they ate will probably come out the other end eventually.

3.  Glade Plug Ins are nontoxic.

4.  Siblings fight.  As long as no one is bleeding or unconscious, they’re probably fine.  Let them fight it out 😉  They’ll  be hugging again in a few minutes.

5.  Just go ahead and buy two of everything.  The principle of sharing can be taught in other ways.

6.  Plates, cups, and eating utensils should all be one color.  Less for them to fight over.

7.  Someone will be crying at least once a day (usually it’s me)!  Especially if you have girls.  It’s normal.

8.  If giving my kids food off of my plate (because “it tastes better”) gets my kids to eat, so be it.

9.  They will do something to surprise and/or embarrass me in public every single time we’re out.

10.  Generally whatever that embarrassing thing is will have something to do with me a) not having any money b) not being fair c) yelling “don’t spank me!” at the top of their lungs d) other peoples’ disabilities or e) all four.  And it will always be said loudly.

11.  It doesn’t matter how many times she tells me she has to pee and we go to the bathroom and she doesn’t go.  We still have to go try each and every time.

12.  Kids will always suddenly get hungry and thirsty and/or have to go to the bathroom the second you leave the house, even if they’ve eaten or already peed.

13.  It is absolutely inevitable that someone will overhear you saying something to your children that will make them want to call social services.

14.  You will respond to their glaring stares by offering that they take your child home (while she’s screaming at the top of her lungs and throwing herself on the floor).

15.  Traveling anywhere with two or more children is a nightmare.  Get used to it.

16.  With one child, I would totally take her in to the gas station to pay for my gas, never to leave her in the car alone.  With two, I lock them in the car, go pay for gas, grab a few snacks, and pray that they don’t kill each other before I get back.

17.  When she says she feels like she’s going to throw up, it’s too late to get her to the bathroom.  You’ll just have to clean up wherever it lands.

18.  It’s almost always projectile.

19.  If you’ve heard your name called 100 times or less in a day, it’s a good day.

20.  There are three things that you simply cannot force your child to do:  eat, sleep, and be quiet.

21.  There will be days when you think a) you wish your name wasn’t “mommy” b) you had a day job (if you’re a stay at home mom that is) c) I would switch with my husband in a heartbeat. d) we are never having any more children.

22.  You almost immediately change your mind because despite all the things you’ve learned about being a mom that you kind of wish you hadn’t, it’s still the very best and most important job in the world.

Young Love

“I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride; so I love you because I know no other way.”

Pablo Neruda

As a photographer, it is my job to watch people, to anticipate their expressions, their interactions, in an effort to capture even a minute glimpse of who they really are. I’ve been watching this couple from afar for a while now. For a while I wasn’t even sure they were a couple.  I’ve seen them in church and at the pool and, while they do act lovingly towards one another, it is so subdued that it hadn’t really occurred to me that they really are more than friends.   And since these two were leaders at our church’s Vacation Bible School recently, I watched more.  On the last day of VBS, they wore these shirts.  You can’t tell it from the pictures (which I hope they will not be too disappointed about), but when they get close together, the hearts on their shirts light up!  When they are apart, the hearts’ lights go out one by one the farther apart they get.  I couldn’t take it one bit longer.  I boldly asked them both if I could take pictures of them that day, and they gladly agreed 🙂

What’s important about this story, though, is that I realized that the reason I didn’t initially see that they were in love isn’t because it was that subdued.  It is because what I see every day (or many days) as “in love” is physically displayed between two people.  Kissing, hugging, flirting.  Those are all characteristics of a couple in love.  These two are so very inspiring to me because they don’t do those things, at least not in public.  And that, my friends, is a godly relationship.  Whether they know it or not, they are representing God with their relationship in a way I haven’t quite seen before in such young people.  The exude love for one other, but it seems so pure and sweet and clean.

So none of this really occurred to me until I had them in that little alleyway behind our church.  For 10 minutes I was in their world and it was such a privilaged 10 minutes.  I got to see up close and personal something I never had as a teenager, something many many people never have, a young, godly relationship and love.   It is always amazing to me that there are young men like him and young women like her still in existence in today’s world, and they give me hope that my girls can have what they have one day.  These two may get married.  They may not.  But what’s important is what they are reflecting to the world right now.    They love each other without pride or mystery or lies.  They love each other because they just do.  They love each other because they know no different, because they know no other way.  God loves us because he is love and knows no other way.  And I’m sure his heart lights dim when we are not near him, and, believe it or not, ours do too.

Relationship: It’s Complicated

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“Real magic in relationships means an absence of judgment of others.”

Wayne Dyer

I recently saw a facebook relationship status that said “Relationship It’s Complicated.” I was a little shocked that facebook would be so astoot as to provide such a choice.  I for one think that if a relationship is worthwhile, it will be complicated.  Complicated is usually a good thing I’ve found.  It means that two people are bringing different experiences, knowledge, wisdom, and perspectives to the table.  It means we are forced in many ways to accept people on their own terms whether we agree with them or not and if it necessary for them to change, we leave it to God and love the person anyway. It means that we have to enter the relationship with the attitude of giving not the attitude of getting.  And it means we have to know and remember that no relationship will ever be 50/50 and that you should remember that, when you’re feeling like you’re giving more than the other person, there was surely a time when they were the ones giving 80 and you were giving 20.

I am so thankful to be making friends and to have friends who are in different walks of life, who come to our complicated relationship with different perspectives and experiences, and who love and care about me despite myself.  I would personally find myself difficult to deal with in a relationship, which makes me even more appreciative that people even bother to deal with me 🙂  I know that all of my relationships are complicated.  They force me to think, to pray, to grow, to love, to learn, to be less controlling and less anal, and I think all of those are good things.  They help me to be a better me.

Here’s some pictures of some complicated and maybe some not as complicated relationships.  You can decide which is which.

We Are Family!

In family life, love is the oil that eases friction, the cement that binds closer together, and the music that brings harmony.

Eva Burrows

Halloween Fun!

We had so much fun this Halloween! I loved seeing my family all dressed up looking adorable and hilarious! It was a crazy, family-fun-oriented night.

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Notes from the Sand 2

In light of where we are, I also want to post notes of what I’ve learned about the beach/ocean since childhood (I mean just because we’re not completely in control doesn’t mean we shouldn’t practice beach safety, right?):

1. Never turn your back on the ocean. It’ll take you off your feet in a hot second and you’ll be eating sand and seashells for the next week. Always stand to the side. It’s the stance you’re most stable and you can see what’s coming your way.

2. Curved fins = dolphins. Straight fins = sharks.

3. Never shake your towel out with the wind coming towards you. Otherwise you’ll be having sand for lunch.

4. Wear sunscreen even when it’s cloudy.

5. If you’re in the ocean, know where the beach exit is and keep an eye on it. Otherwise you might be walking a mile (or two) to get back to it after the tide has taken you up or down shore.

6. Big wave coming at you? Duck under it but take a deep breath. See number 7.

7. If a wave holds you under, don’t panic. Keep holding your breath. It WILL release you and you’ll be pushed to the surface.

8. Know which way the tide is going before you go into the ocean. Whether it’s out or in or going out or coming in could make a difference in your safety level.

9. If you’re caught in a rip tide, float. When it’s over, you can swim back to shore.

10. Have a boogie board? Use the velcro attachment. The boogie board  can be used as a flotation device.

11. If you’re a body surfer (like me), remember:  if the pull is strong and the wave is medium to large, don’t take it unless you want a really rough ride.  If the pull is strong and the wave is small with no umf you won’t get a ride.  If the pull is strong and the wave is small but strong, go for it!

12. Lastly, have respect for the sea. It’s bigger and stronger than you and contains lots of scary animals.