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Monthly Archives: May 2009

All In the Family

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Here are some family moments including all of my family. You may be able to see the Peanut looks a little like Daddy (sarcasm enter here) and Jellybean…well, I”m not so sure about her yet. I look like my mom of course. Bloke actually took on the best attributes of both is parents, but I don’t have pictures of them in digital form.

Avery and Grandma

Daddy Tickles

Anabel and Grandpa

Great grandpa

feeding daddy

Holding On

Runs in the Family

Sambloke 3

Break Time

Unfortunately, I’m missing some of Granny Fran and of Granddad…sorry guys!

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Saturday on Sunday

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I forgot to post my fun family moments yesterday, so here are some of my random favorites so far this year!

Tasting Snow

Bel's First Snow 2

Funny PhotoThe Dog

War and Roses

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2He called a little child and had him stand among them. 3And he said: “I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.  Matthew 18:2-3

It’s kind of funny how conflicts change.  For weeks now Bloke and I have discussed, fought, argued, yelled, and generally ignored every bit of marital training we possessed.  I mean it’s been one atomic bomb away from WWIII in our house. I mean you’ve heard the phrase “you could cut the tension with a knife”?  No no no.  How about a chain saw.  I Before we separated we fought over addiction, neglect, video games, parenting, and a number of other things.  Now that Bloke is a Christian, we’ve been arguing over guess what? Religion!  I mean really it didn’t always seem like religion, but it really was.  It all boils down to what each of us believes about certain aspects of Christianity and how we were willing to compromise on the things we disagree about.  I’m personally not that super great at compromise….I was an only child.  So, fun times!

I’ve found that he has a lot of questions that I really just don’t.  He has a lot of views that are contrary to mine.  He has a completely different background than mine…almost the exact opposite in fact. I’ve begun to wonder why I don’t have the questions he has.  Questions like if God is sovereign why do we need to pray?  And where did different denominations get their doctrine from?  The Bible?  Does that mean they’re wrong or we’re wrong? Why if we have godly desires does God not provide them? Or will he provide them later?  Why?  What about the other books that were not included in the Bible?  Are they real truth?  How is God all powerful and all knowing if his mind was changed by Moses?

My husband is a thinker, an intellectual, a need proof kind of guy which eludes me.  The whole point of being a Christian to me is believing without seeing and seeing when you believe. I became super frustrated super quick with his questions and my lack of answers and his decision not to seek outside counsel on many questions.  Why don’t I care about this stuff?  Why do I not have these questions?  Bloke answered for me.  I have (for the most part) blind faith.  My faith is sufficient.  It’s strange, really.  A sign of maturity in our faith is immaturity if you will.  The Lord says we are to have the faith of a child…unfortunately, it may take until we are physically mature to reach that pure, innocent, perfect faith.  If we ever reach it at all.  I look at the other Christians I associate with and at the various stages of spiritual transformation they are in.  Many (most) are way way more spiritually mature than I.  The Lord has been working hard in their lives.  Many of them believe wholeheartedly without a doubt that everything in the Bible is whole and complete and true.  I’m not there.  Bloke is certainly not there.  But I know that there are some answers I just don’t need.  I need that somewhat blind faith.  I need to simply trust in the truth that Jesus is our Lord and Savior and He died on the cross for my sins.  No other answers are going to save me more or less from Hell.  I’m going to Heaven weather I know the answers or not.  They probably wouldn’t make me happy even if I did know them because I’d just have more questions.  I also recognize that Bloke’s questions and his desire to research the answers are all about where he is in his journey of faith and that he, like all of us, is maturing.

In the Bible, Job 11:7 says, “Can you fathom the mysteries of God? Can you probe the limits of the Almighty?” I can’t.  So, Bloke, I call a truce to our spiritual differences.  I call peace in our home.  I’m not going to argue or fight about this.  I’m tired of WWIII.  And I’m sorry for being so stubborn and uncompromising and for fighting God’s very special and unique refining of you.   While I’m not at perfect peace in my faith, I do not need to ceaselessly strive for answers I may never get.  I’ll learn all I need to know when I get to Heaven and so will you.  You, however, feel free to look for answers.  I do so hope you find them.  And when we get to Heaven, we can compare notes 😉

ps.  We recently had an anniversary, and Bloke and I were simply happy that we were still married…oh, yeah, and actually living together.  That’s an act of God all by itself.  Here are some pictures of the beautiful flowers Bloke gave me!

Anniversary Roses

Anniversary Roses 3

Anniversary Roses 2

Bath Time, Baby!

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I really need to start taking some time each week to really remember the fun family times that I have, even if they were not that week but months or even years ago. So I decided to make Saturday that day!

Swimming

Kicking Feet

Yummy bubbles

Sisters Splashing

A Mother’s Day Indeed

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I haven’t written in quite a while. Honestly, it’s because what I have to write is not all that positive. I at least like to end on a positive note and that’s not even going to happen. So I’m happy to have a happy reason to write today! I’m generally of the belief that every day (or at least more than once a year) should be Valentine’s Day, Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, etc. We should always celebrate our loves, mothers, and fathers. But as we know, we really don’t. We shouldn’t give into the whirlwind of commercialism that goes with these special days (along with the fifty million other “special” days of the year). But I can’t help myself. I’m not always so good at making my husband, mother, and father feel special. I kind of need that day. Sometimes I view it as one big make up day. “Here, let me make up for all the times I didn’t make you feel special or loved.” Horrible, but true.

It’s sad really. When I was a kid (and even an adult) I used to tell my mom she was the best mom in the world. She would say, “I’m your only mom in the world.” This is true. As I got older I got wittier and would say, “I don’t need to know all the other moms in the world to know you’re the best.” This is true for me. My mom really does rock. God really did give her to ME (and for a good reason too. I think any other mom would have given me up for adoption at about 11). She is the only one (I guess along with maybe my dad but I won’t push it 😉 who will ever truly love me for who I am – good and bad – and love me unconditionally forever. Even my husband cannot do that. He can never love me the way my mom does. I’m not saying it’s better or worse…only different.

My mom is a real life super mom. I’m 28 years old, and my mom is working so very hard to provide a comfortable lifestyle for all of us while my husband is out of work. She’s seen me (and continues to see me) through many a tough time. She lets me make my own decisions even if she thinks they’re bad and then picks me up off the floor and helps me dust off my pants and try again. She doesn’t expect me to be any way other than the way I am and then is pleasantly surprised when I change. She has endured through so much heartache and suffering over the past year. She continues to forgive, love, and counsel even when she feels like she can’t. They say, “you are your child’s greatest advocate.” My mom has wholeheartedly been my advocate since birth, and I need way more than a blog post, a present, some flowers, and a lifetime to thank her for that.

My mom has freckles. She has somewhat wrinkly hands. She has green eyes and small ears. When she was younger (and even some now) she resembled very much Meryl Streep. She’s beautiful and she always smells nice…even when she’s sweaty. She is a teacher, a mother, a mother-in-law, a grandmother, a wife, a caregiver, a counselor, a financier, a mentor, a vet, a doctor and nurse, a chef, a taker in of stray animals (and often people), a giver of money and time, a gardener, a handywoman, a church goer, a singer, a piano player, a friend, a playmate, a chauffer….she holds a plethora of hats in her hands daily. I constantly pray for the Lord to fill her well so she can continue being what she is and doing what she does. My mother isn’t perfect….but she’s perfect to me and that’s what counts.

I love you mom!

Super Mom

Mom, you’re a wonderful mother,
So gentle, yet so strong.
The many ways you show you care
Always make me feel I belong.

You’re patient when I’m foolish;
You give guidance when I ask;
It seems you can do most anything;
You’re the master of every task.

You’re a dependable source of comfort;
You’re my cushion when I fall.
You help in times of trouble;
You support me whenever I call.

I love you more than you know;
You have my total respect.
If I had my choice of mothers,
You’d be the one I’d select!

By Joanna Fuchs

Avery and Grandma

Anabel and Grandma

My mom

Kiss for my mom

The Girls