Another Valentine’s To Remember

I should have written this yesterday, but I simply didn’t have time. If you recap last year’s Valentines for my family (HERE and HERE), my husband and I were separated…but not apart. We were in the middle of a reconciliation.  We were in the throes of a dark night that had been pitch black for so very long, and we were just starting to see the light.

Well, this year we are together…happily. It’s been yet another rough year, but progressively better. Bloke and I are (I can’t believe I can say this) happily married! We see the steps God has taken to get us to where we are. We feel more bonded as a couple than I think we even did when we first got married. When I had lost just about every ounce of love I had for my husband, God took what was at the bottom of the barrel and turned it into full-fledged love. The slate actually does feel clean.

The pastor at the church we are visiting preached the Transfiguration sermon yesterday (see Luke 9:28-36).  It was such a touching sermon for Bloke and I because it not only talked about the transfiguration of Jesus but the hope the disciples had afterward.  There was something to cling to.  Hope has been a recurring theme in our lives as a couple and as a family.  The pastor said, “There is a dawn that follows every darkness.”  God made this true.  There is no day without night and vice versa.  Bloke and I (along with our extended family and even friends) have been through a long, long night, and we so hope that God does not want us to endure that particular one again.  I think I can say, however, that morning has broken – or is breaking – on a new dawn for us.  I really do feel like it is a new marriage, a complete family, and a new love.

Morning Has Broken

Morning has broken, like the first morning
Blackbird has spoken, like the first bird
Praise for the singing, praise for the morning
Praise for the springing fresh from the word

Sweet the rain's new fall, sunlit from heaven
Like the first dewfall, on the first grass
Praise for the sweetness of the wet garden
Sprung in completeness where his feet pass

Mine is the sunlight, mine is the morning
Born of the one light, Eden saw play
Praise with elation, praise every morning
God's recreation of the new day

Not A Box of Chocolates

You know when Forrest Gump says his “mama always says ‘life is like a box of chocolates. Ya never know what you’re gonna get.’”? Well his mama was not smart either. Life is NOT like a box of chocolates. It doesn’t come in a pretty box. Nine times out of ten it’s not even sweet. And while I get the similie that the inside of each one is different, but sorry, life isn’t usually that tasty…especially if it’s Godiva.

No no no. I think life is like a roller coaster. Ups downs and the feelings that accompany riding a roller coaster apply to lots of times in life. For me, I’m on the upside down loop dee loop of a roller coaster. I’m feeling scared..no not scare, terrified, exhilarated, hopeful (I’m always hopeful on a roller coaster…hopeful that I’ll get off alive…especially on the upside down part), and happy. I’m also, however, on that part where you’re really wondering if the equipment is going to keep you in the machine or if it’s just gonna dump you out right when your upside down…but you’re willing to take the risk anyway. I think that’s called mistrust. But the feeling isn’t strong enough for you not to go on the ride.
Yes, I think that’s exactly what the thought of reconciliation with my husband is. Yes, a very touchy subject for many. And some might even gasp at the idea that I’m so public about it. But why not? I’ve found it’s better to satisfy curiosity with the truth than to let people make up something. And I also know that there are those that care and truly want to know how I’m doing. Well, if you’ve every been on a roller coaster that goes upside down, then you know.

Well I talked about that mistrust. I read some good verses this morning:

My son, let them not vanish from your sight; Keep sound wisdom and discretion, So they will be life to your soul And adornment to your neck. Then you will walk in your way securely And your foot will not stumble.When you lie down, you will not be afraid; When you lie down, your sleep will be sweet. Do not be afraid of sudden fear Nor of the onslaught of the wicked when it comes; For the LORD will be your confidence And will keep your foot from being caught. Proverbs 3:22-26

I am reminded of several things: The Lord will give me His divine wisdom when I seek it. He will not let me fall. He will save me from my fear and protect me from the wicked onslaught. I learned that I am not trusting my husband to do right. I am trusting myself to my true husband, the Lord.

When we walk in divine wisdom, we can rest assured that the Lord is with us always. He won’t allow us to enter into any situation that He has not anticipated. Nor will He permit a circumstance unless He intends it for our good. – Dr. Charles Stanley